enough

is there enough of me?  for myself, yes. the thought of spending eternity as me is simply not inspiring. blessedly there are my guppies to share life and whatever is after with.

the ever demanding issue/guilt is... am i able to give them enough. enough love, enough support, enough laughter, enough memories, enough mom? this topic could lend itself to pages of thoughts and acumen. (baby having no sense of personal space during mom and daughter time)

it is what it is: 4 kids and one mom. i am divided. (baby with mom talking to son time, this son actually loves mom talks)

(baby with me while son asks me to swim with him in the lake...it looks like i am doing a lot of sitting these days)  
i say i am doing the best that i can, but i know that is a lie. just so they know they are my world and my non-world.  maybe a nanny could semi help, or a sister wife.