freedom is an inside trust job
“We cannot continue to seek outside of ourselves for the things we need from within.” -John O’ Donohue
There is a birthright of freedom we all have, but freedom is an inside job to gain access to it. How do we get free? What do we need from within ourselves? Short answer, EVERYTHING. What do we need specifically?
The practice of illuminating your unconscious operating system to yourself.
The power of this practice need not be vouched for; it is the practice that evolves the lives of every single human on the planet toward wholeness and freedom.
When you become conscious, you become a creator.
When you are living from the conscious mind you are limited to the extent of which you are unaware. We all deal with a certain level of awareness that reveals to us the nature of where we are not yet free in timing perfect to us. Freedom is the process of becoming aware of what you were previously unaware of.
When you really understand this, you begin to understand the absurdity of how you have been limiting your life purely by the nature of what you think freedom to be, with all the conditions we place upon it. Freedom simply is and you reveal more of its nature to yourself through becoming conscious of what was otherwise unconsciously operating you.
We are becoming conscious of how we have not been operating our lives, but rather that underlying subconscious narratives have been operating us. We are doing the inner work to clear the space to even access the unconscious operator within is plenty of work. It is blood, sweat and tears work. But when you truly get to the nucleus of your inner landscape you win. The persona upon which the false constructs that hold you back crumble. You gain the power to re-write the operating manual, not from the unconscious conditioning from your formative years, but from your conscious awareness NOW.
Life is about asking the “right questions.” The level of depth you experience in your life is corollary to depth of questions you ask to life.Your life is a feedback loop, and it very well beckons your collaboration in thoughtful design. Meaningful design is simply a measure of how deeply the parameter of the question itself have been explored.
Designing your life is just as much deconstruction as it is construction. Personally, I would assert that 90% of the work is deconstruction. To design your life means you have to make space within the inner landscape that is available for you to re-imagine. Chances are, much of this landscape is occupied by previous ideals, identities, and beliefs. Beautiful, normal, and right where you need to be.
So we have to ask questions to our deepest self and to life that will clear some of the space. This is as energetic as it is emotional and physical. “How much of this idea I have of what my life should be is authentically mine?” Often, our lives are underlying supported by old notions of identity that perhaps are no longer aligned with who you are now. To re-align your identity you must undergo a type of death to be reborn.
Our cultures used to program certain rites of passage into our becoming that ignited this exact response. It is intimate dialogue with life. You want to become new, and life can help you find your second mountain. An Ego death, Identity Crisis, Vision Journey, and whatever it may have been are all design elements that are to ally our highest becoming. Yeshua took off on a 40 day vision journey himself. Now we have to take the initiative to open to these elements on our own, which we resist naturally because who wants to die willingly? A lot of people are happy in their illusions.
If we go much of our lives without purifying who we are, therein carrying much baggage that is no longer of service, imagine the amount of freedom and intimacy this is preventing of you. You deserve to live a life of intimacy and impact, but you have to initiate the conversation with life deeply and sincerely.
I view life as series of design elements because life is design. We choose elements and how to assemble them together which then creates our “life.” There is tremendous power in this agency, but this agency cannot alone create the life you want to live. The reason why we feel tension in our lives or confusion is because we begin to believe that we need to know all of the answers in order to live our most meaningful life.
This idea is flawed. Life is a paradox, it is proven time and time again. Only when you let go of your attachment to a desire do you then paradoxically receive what you desire. Vulnerability is intimacy. When I said I was willing to let the old die and not know how the chips would fall, I fostered extreme trust fall with the Universe.
Our intimacy with life is being in full trust without needing to have it all figured out. This journey was not designed for you to go about alone, life is your greatest teacher and ally. We can befriend the mystery, and fear dissolves. Our fears dwell in the liminal space we try to control within the mystery of the not yet defined.
Without the need to control the mystery, you develop deeper trust. The way you trust life is the way you make love to life. Trust is designed into your life. Yet, trust can only exist where fear once lived. To create trust, you must clear the inner landscape where fear dwelled. Fear is distrust. Where fear dissolves there life calls you to build with trust. Trust is a sort of shrine to the death of the fear that made way for trust to arise. The fear is not forgotten, but honored as it was perfectly so to make you who you are now.
You can see how the intimacy of life can be broken down into small elements. When we see the elements of the whole, it makes it easier to deconstruct the whole efficiently. It also helps us gather insight from each little piece of life that we remove. Life often needs to first be subtractive to then multiply. Simply adding elements to your life will never amplify your reality to the extent that you truly desire.
So, what ensues when we liberate the false constructs about ourselves that we have believed to be true for so long?
Freedom. Pure freedom.
Though the mind may try to speak of something in specific, the foundation upon what it tries to speak to is freedom. Freedom is your birthright, but to access it we have to strip away all of the constructs that we have placed on top of it. Freedom is not a conditional “If this, then that,” state of being. Freedom just is. When you are liberated from constraints that have been stored purely within the subconscious, you immediately become more of the person you always hoped to become.
You are the best piece of hardware ever designed. Your capacity to create something from nothing, infer between energetic bounds, and to experience presence is remarkable.
But when was the last time you updated your operating system?
The technological human. Technology is ancient. What we call technology today is a complete subset of contemporary technology deriving from the technology that is ever present. Things like states of beings are technologies, they are programs. Grace. Forgiveness. Melancholy. Arousal. It all derives from the primordial program that is the human.
Consciousness is the software.
The body is the hardware.
Balance is a practice.
Your operating system is critically important because it determines the user face upon which you perceive the world. Are you still running Macintosh-1 or Windows 1, I was on old man operating systems until the system crashed. Your operating system is your mind. But what part of the mind is it? The subconscious.
Your conscious mind is about 5% of your operating systems capacity. This is the space from which we actively participate in creating our lives. The other 95% is where you are not an active participant in your life. Imagine what you could bring into form with just a little bit more access to that potential. Imagine the freedom that would ensue, that you otherwise didn’t know existed.
This is why updating your operating system is crucial. Updating the system is clearing the stored codes of previous narratives that were developed as defense and survival mechanisms. The very codes that are now holding you back. These codes are stored in your subconscious through the reinforcement of the stories that support them, which have been occurring all of your life. The subconscious codes of limitation are merely false constructs, that hold you back, that some aspect of you is attached to. Updating your operating system allows you to have a more harmonized experience with life, but most importantly within yourself.
The updates are available. Some are gentle and simple, others are a more drastic. Gentle is adjusting self talk, leaning into your triggers, learning a new skill. Effective and simple meditation can be gentle, however my meditation launched my full operating system update. The drastic updates can also be via plant medicine.
Look into yourself to know what updating needs to be done. This work is not easy, but it will make your ability to actualize potential more available and your freedom more tangible.
The essence of your being will be revealed as you peel off the layers of your distorted concepts and old belief systems layer by layer. As you delve into your subconscious mind you see the residences of these illusions that have haunted you. Some of them are not even residences, they are full on hotels built up over time. As you work diligently to eliminate these hotels of illusion you are able to submit to a higher authority of your inner being. This is a return to christ like consciousness as your being is in cooperation with love, forgiveness and compassion.
This is the path of the master you get to claim as your true identity.
You are not just a male or female human being residing on the planet, nor are you just a soul in a physical meat suit that is here to live in fear and confusion, but you are part of a greater collective of royal heritage. You get to the stage of your evolution where the assignment that you have earned throughout many lifetimes and many ages places you in the situations of this earth experiment so you can bring the expertise of your race back to your own civilization, or as Ayahuasca taught me, simply to experience the expertise of delight. If I wasn't motivated by the concept of my home civilization or planet, mother Aya motivated me to love Gaia enough to participate in the expertise of delight here on her.
Where do you fall in this divine plan? What is the message stamped on your soul? What is the echo in your heart telling you to focus in on and perfect in the great tapestry that is in the making? The golden spark has laid dormant long enough and it is time to claim your true identity. The core of you is calling.
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