Lion's Gate: Unless It's Kicks

After a bobcat sighting in my near backyard I must write down somethings for this new moon. If the rest of this year plays out like first sojourn of 2022 then some swift happenings will occur for the rest of the year. After writing out some thoughts about the rest of the year for each child, I turned inwards for a couple weeks of introspection and study. Now is fruits of the years of labor, and they are delectable. A house of males who enable me to be free and held. What a dream to round the corner to each son's starseed eyes. Healthy against the odds, we all keep on digging out teeth in deep to the marrow of life. May 2022 I witnessed a merging of my scattered soul fragments ripped off in the storms. As well as a gathering of all parts of each of my tribe, from all corners of the universe, to distill the gold and cast away the dross. Such to leave the collective Philosopher's Stone made of each of our distilled matter. 

Blogging entered into this tribe's arena in 2006. A nursing baby, new small town, a bar exam, a new marriage, two kids and some anxiety attacks sneaking in...blogging sauntered in with such rich fodder for creativity. The song Unless It's Kicks by Okkervill River would automatically play without permission when the blog was pulled up. The lyrics of choice:

What gives this mess some grace
Unless it's kicks, man
Unless it's fiction
Unless it's sweat or it's songs

What hits against this chest
Unless it's a sick man's hand
From some mid-level band
He's been driving too long

On a dark windless night
With the stereo on
With the towns flying by
And the ground getting soft

And the sound in the sky
Coming down from above
It surrounds you at times
And it's whispering, oh

What pulls your body down
That is quicksand
So we climb out quick, hand over hand
For your mouth's all filled up

A chap from art school mentioned my lovely song choice and it remains one of the 5 songs on my phone that my car defaults to upon turning the ignition over with my phone connected to blue tooth. One of Dad's iconic sayings was "Life is a kick." The grace of this "mess" is that it has been a life of kicks. Lived in crevasses and peaks I climbed out hand over hand which generated entheogen: "Generate the God Within". The kingdom is in us. the Bible is full of characters that are different versions of us so we can find that Christ consciousness as emulated by Jesus. Not that J-dawg is our Savior. He is an example. The alchemy that occurs in your being after being reduced to the zero, calcination, is a fresh slice of hell. Seemingly worse with each life storm. This human was the zero (negative capability) like the sunglass wearing Bob Dylan quipping, "I'm not here." I was not here. I had nil in my energy body. That was a relentless kick.

Then came the rest of the processes that uses fire to separate. To baptize. You can use the fire of the tangible to change into the imaginal. Use the fire of the imagination to change the existential into the transcendental (Gnosticism). Divorce from materiality and duality. Look for immateriality and non-duality. Fiery kick.

Your Egyptian sarcophagus opens, hermitized and new (make it new: Ezra Pound). You are now able to fully be the multitudes you knew you were keeping in a coffin. Whitman has got to be yelping a bit for this process occurring en masse right now. Especially amongst women. The power play male roles we slipped into during the past few decades has landed many women with an out of balance sun and moon, yin and yang. Stepping back into the dreamy water land of the intuitive and flowing feminine is the balm of gillead. The tables have turned and the female royalty of Gaia are working through that shifty balancing act to  sink into the fluid night of the moon in a much more substantial way. After following some marching orders I had via dreams and meditation, I began witnessing during my hermit phase an inordinate percentage of my women friends reaching out to me, were being called to drastically change their lives via a combination of career change; health and wellness areas like reiki, plant medicine, somatic healing, equine therapy; divorce; moving countries; changing sexuality, and so on. The awakening, as many call it, is not subtle. Those who are changing their energy and the means by which they get it (especially having it DIRECTLY FROM SOURCE, no middleman allowed) are distinctly on a different path than those who choose to stay in the coffin at the hands of any institution who inflict random rules and retributions. The Mormon church is the ultimate Multi-Level Marketing set up that has the upper ups and all flows down from the prophet to the saints. The prophet says "follow the government" and get vaccinated; even a 6 month old child. The OG prophet was a gold-digging occultist. His mother was an occultist. He started a cult. That's a kick!

"On that day many will say to me, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?"

"I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness." -Matt. 7:22-23

Less ness. Less Ness, more divine. There are false prophets among us that are no better than sounding brass or a tinkling symbol. These men lead young children into a brainwashed and toxic culture that is mournful to extract oneself from. Many miracles performed in the LDS church, like Judas had gifts in the name of Christ, like casting out devils, yet he could not prevent them from entering into himself. External performances of religion don't make the person nearer to Christ consciousness, yet the saints expect to be the FIRST admitted into Heaven. "But Lord! We filled up the highest stations of the church, proselyted and did so much good!" I never knew you. You who work iniquity. Get thee from me. That will be a kick, eh?

As opposed to doubling down on religion or government I have done a few things. First, I have started a concierge service for alternative healthcare modalities practiced with the utmost ethics by practicioners who are tip top. The women who came to me, and I to them, in various ways of communicating without words. This group of women did not find each other by themselves. One was 20 years absent. One was an ex-wife of 4 years of a friend of ours I had met only once before her divorce; the deep knowing it was her that was going to be my ride or die in this came before hers, but she knew and acted quickly as well. The Egyptian gold is here! As this new partner in healing dreamed was coming out of the ceiling in our Boulder City, NV office.  I'd say that is a kick.

Second, after having a waking dream while running the streets of Kanab, Utah at 5 am, we bought almost 300 acres of land in outside of Kanab off the 89 toward Lake Powell. It is stunning. It has water. It has power. It will be a farm and sustainable living community for the Menlove family and their posterity. The weather is divine, the rocks speak non stop, and the sky. Eventually, a full healing center from the seed of this Concierge service going on now, in the fields of Kanab Native American land. A strong pull to the land lends me to think this will heal the Native American trauma, as well as the Mormon trauma, the land I own has deep in its belly. 

Third, became a practitioner of transcendental meditation. I do supplement with plant medicine in microdosing, but the most effective form of acceleration to downloads for me is TM. This practice has opened up the latent, yet known, clairvoyant abilities that lie at the core of who I am. I choose to come here to wrangle with myself in a sarcophagus. I knew when I was pregnant with Charly a clear voice say "you are not you anymore. you live a path for her and your future children. what do you want for her?" I thought very clearly that day "I want my daughter to have every door open to her, every choice made available for her to choose what brings her closer to heaven here on earth." I vowed to do whatever and suffer whatever for her to have those choices. YO! SHE DOES!!!!! That's a god damn surreal kick.

More kicks to come.